My Name
by Ariellabella
Summary: a major rewrite of my fic with the same title, I deleted the old one James made a mistake. Fortunatly Lily and Sirius have something devious up their sleeves.


My Name Sirius/James

The sun shone through the window, almost blinding him as he sat up. Groaning, he fell back and threw an arm over his eyes, trying to block out the insufferable light. Footsteps alerted him of another's presence in the room but he lay unmoving, hoping they would dismiss him. Since when, however, was luck on his side?

"Prongs!" the voice was bright and cheerful. "I know you're awake so don't even try to pretend. Come on Prongsy."

"Don't call me that," he mumbled through gritted teeth and turned over, knowing Sirius would not give up till he was out of bed and dressed.

"Someone's grumpy this morning," Sirius said and flopped onto the bed, sinking back into the soft warmth. "Oh this is comfortable, is your bed softer than mine?"

James threw a pillow at Sirius and flipped onto his back. "I don't care; right now all I want to do is get back to sleep."

"Oh, long night with Evans huh?" Sirius grinned and elbowed him in the ribs.

James grimaced and curled up; Sirius didn't know that it _had_ been a long night with Lily, but not a pleasant one. They had fought. Again. James had called out another's name. Again.

He wanted to slap himself for it, it had been the third time he had done it, had said Sirius's name. But that was an easy mistake to make; after all, he spent so much time with the bloody tosser it was only natural to call out a name he so often screamed.

Who did Evans think she was accusing him of fancying Sirius? The idea was of course ridiculous, wasn't it? He couldn't fancy Sirius; they were best friends. He wasn't gay. Right? So what if Lily's kisses and caresses hadn't exactly been catching his attention lately? It was just coincidence they stopped about the same time he had begun noticing the way Sirius walked, how his hair fell into his eyes when he bent over laughing, or how peaceful and serene he looked when he slept. Shit, he was doing it again; this was exactly what had gotten him in trouble in the first place.

"You alright mate?" Sirius's voice was concerned and he shifted to sit up. "You're not looking to great."

"Thanks," James said sarcastically avoiding the dark, delving eyes. He didn't want to tell him what happened with Lily. Nosey was Sirius' middle name and he would want to know why they had broken up. "I'm fine, just need a nice cold shower, still exhausted."

"Are you sure there's nothing you want to talk about?" Sirius asked, sensing the hesitation in James' weary voice.

"No, Black, I'm fine now shove off." Words sharper than necessary, he pushed off the bed and shifted quickly to the bathroom.

All thorough classes he avoided Sirius's curious, questioning looks and uncharacteristically kept his mind on his work, at least he hoped that's what it looked like he was doing.

Transfiguration ended and James almost ran out of the room, making a great show of flipping through his still open book. Remus drew up beside him, peering over his shoulder. "Turning a suit into a dress, my James, I never knew cross-dressing was your thing. You okay today?" Remus asked.

"I'm fine," he rushed to answer, ignoring the teasing question before, "Why is everyone asking me that today, nothing's wrong."

Remus cocked an eyebrow at his hurried response and nodded, "alright, if you say so, but we all know." With a mysterious wink, the werewolf dropped back and began to chat quietly with Peter.

James swung to face him, planning on stopping the boy and interrogating him on his dubious use of language; in his place was Sirius, a very unhappy looking Sirius for that matter.

"What the hell is up with you Prongs?" he snapped before grabbing his sleeve and pulling him along behind him down the hall. He didn't let go until they reached a closed door, with a forceful shove, Sirius pushed him inside and closed to door before rounding on him.

"You want to tell me what your problem is, why you're hell bent on avoiding me like the plague, why you're keeping secrets from me and acting like all our hard work the last five years never happened?" Sirius had walked towards him and was standing a little closer than he liked, eyes flaring dramatically.

"I-I don't know what you mean," James's voice stumbled over the words just as his body collided with a cold wall.

He growled and stepped even closer. "You know exactly what I mean, I talked to Evans today."

His mind began to race frantically; unfortunately the best his mind could do was race to see if it could shout 'shit' or 'bloody hell' faster.

"You broke up with her last night, why didn't you tell me, or better, why did you lie to me, this morning you said nothing was wrong, I would say that was something wrong! We work for years to get you the girl of your dreams and you repay us by breaking up with her before two months are up. You tell me everything, why didn't you talk to me about this and what happened anyway? I thought you trusted me." His voice had softened now and he placed a hand on James's shoulder.

The heat of his hand burned through the material and James fought not to drop to his knees and worship the very centre of his fantasies. Bloody hell, did he just admit that he dreamt of Sirius, watched him, lusted over him, loved him?

"We just had some problems, ones that couldn't be fixed, that's all."

Sirius regarded him with a scowl before replying flatly, "you're lying."

"It's true; something came between us, that's all!" Panic laced his voice and he wrung his hands together feebly.

"Then you're not telling me everything. Was it something, or someone? Because you two always seemed so happy, you would tell me if you like someone else, right?"

James didn't respond, just stared into Sirius's eyes, unable to look away. He didn't know what to do; he couldn't lie again, but he couldn't tell the truth either, right? As far as he knew, Sirius wasn't gay, but at the same time, he had never shown any interest in girls, was it too much to jump to conclusions?

"Prongs, James, you can tell me anything, I can tell you're worried, just tell me, gods it couldn't be as bad as you're making it out to be." Sirius gave him a small smile and stepped closer, it was almost stifling, having him so close they were a hair away from touching.

"It is Pads, it really is," his voice had dropped low and he looked away.

A cool hand touched under his chin and urged his head up. "Look at me, please tell me, let me help you. You know I'm always here for you no matter what happens."

James eyes met his and the love in them struck him like an arrow. Before he could stop and think, he leant forward and pressed his lips to Sirius's.

To his shock, Sirius didn't pull away, instead a hand went to the back of his head, pulling him into a strong embrace. "Sirius, I-."

"Shh," Sirius whispered against his mouth, "I know, you don't have to tell me, I've known." With a sigh of relief, James melted into the embrace, moving his lips against Sirius's warm soft ones. Curling his fingers in Sirius' too long hair, he almost cried from the sheer happiness, he'd finally found the place in his heart that had been missing for so long.

Neither noticed when the door to the empty classroom opened and someone slipped in. James was too caught up in the feel of Sirius's tongue against his to hear a wooden chair scrape softly against the floor.

"Finally!" They jumped apart, startled at the voice. Lily grinned at them, folding her arms over her chest as she leant back in the chair. "I thought you two would never figure it out and get togeather."

"You knew?" James asked, dumbfounded.

Sirius nodded and smiled. "Did you really think Evans would let you call out my name while snogging and not hit you? Why do you think she suddenly accepted your invitation to Hogsmede after rejecting you a million times? I told her everything mate, about your dreaming, the way you looked at me, how you yelled my name after wanking that time in the shower you thought everyone was gone to dinner."

James jaw dropped as his cheeks flared a bright red. "I-if you told her all that, then why did she go out with me for two weeks and snog me after the first date?"

"Well," Lily said, sauntering over to Sirius and slinging a companionable arm over his shoulders. "We made a deal."

"Yeah, you see," Sirius continued, white teeth flashing in a bright smile, "I got her advice and help making you realize how much you want to be with me."

"And I get to indulge in one of my more unattainable fantasizes."

Brow furrowing, James asked quizzically, "what fantasy?"

Dropping a quick kiss on Sirius' cheek, Lily squeezed James' shoulder and whispered, "I got to snog a gay man." Then she left the room, pleased smile adorning her freckled face.

Astonishment still playing over his features, James whispered horrified, "so you...you really heard me that time in the shower?"

With a smug wink, Sirius commented, "I didn't just listen, naughty Prongsy."


End file.
